Reasons to be Grateful 🙏

I'm having a stay at home day.  It's not like me but I've had a busy week, and the possibility of a busy week ahead.  I feel like I need a rest.   On the other hand I have a mental list of bits to catch up on, they will have to wait. The thought of 'How on earth did I ever manage to work full time,  raise a family,  cope with a house and have an elderly parent live with us?' has crossed my mind again.  The answer is, of course,  I didn't do it well.  Somehow though, we muddled through,  and although I wish I had made some different choices, I might not be the survivor I am today without those experiences.

I am grateful for getting to the age I am now.  I think I'm right in saying that I have lived for more years than either of my grandmothers.   Sadly, my memories of both are sketchy.  Thankfully I have been able to hold my own grand child.   I am grateful to wake up every day and to have choices.  I'm grateful for so many things.   Having to wait 6 years longer for my pension, while living with the critical autoimmune condition TTP is another thing 🤔, but this post is not about that subject. 

The sun is shining as I write,  but the temperature outside is cold!  There are clouds, there is a northern wind and my bones feel chilled.  I ache and I'm just slightly anxious about my blood.   I may just have overdone the exercise this week but I'm grateful for an appointment tomorrow to have my blood levels tested.  I had a TTP free year in 2023, I so hope that 2024 will be a repeat performance. 

We all need some sunshine here in the UK, I think.  My Tai Chi teacher says we should be grateful for the rain, and I am, but if we could share it out a little more evenly around the earth that would be ideal.  I hope this summer is kind to all.

I've been reading TTP survivors' stories and there are, of course, several threads that holds us all together. The diagnosis, journey through treatment and recovery, our families and friends that have supported us and the amazing staff at our NHS hospitals.  One story I read this morning mentions the nurses that sat with us at night.  I have tears when I remember the nurse from Ghana who washed my feet when the risk of using a shower was too great.   The nurse from Bilbao who went home to visit her family at the weekend.  The plasmaphereis nurse who also cared for an elderly relative.   So much love.

Today isn’t one of my better  days.  It’s these days that I count my blessings and remember how lucky I am.   These days always make me feel philosophical.  We can go through life wanting more, feeling disillusioned and dissatisfied, or we can consider that so many are worse off than we are, and be grateful.  If we always ask for more, and can’t have it, we are bound to be left feeling disgruntled.  Perhaps there’s something humbling about surviving anything, especially a near death experience.  In the end, we don’t chose when or where we were born.  We are lucky if we choose how we live.  Today, I can choose to have a rest day.  And I only feel just a little bit guilty.

So what have I been doing?  Trying to finish a project, blogging, and brain training!   My crochet may not be intricate, but its made with love.  Not a complete waste of time 😊😉

♥️